If I were to write a book this minute, it would be titled something like this: Never Let Your Child Wear Flip-Flops to the Library (and Other Parenting Tips No One Ever Told You). It all started out innocently enough - a trip to our local library. A great place. A place you want your kids to love. But, maybe in our case, the library is too great. They love it too much. They feel too comfortable there. Where are all the old crotchety librarians hissing "Shhhhh" when I need them?
Before we headed out today, I led the kids in a rousing cheer-like recitation of the rules.
Do we yell in the library? Nooooo!
Do we speak quietly in the library? Yessss!
Do we speak quietly in the library? Yessss!
Do we run in the library? Noooo!
Do we walk in the library? Yessss!
Do we jump in the library? Noooo! (I threw this rule in there because I anticipated trouble with those wily flip-flops, but did I listen to that inner voice and make her change into sneakers? noooooo!)
Do we listen and cooperate with mommy? Yessss!
I was fooled into thinking that yelling with me in giddy unison indicated understanding of the rules. Apparently, when a 2 year old yells in unison, she is actually, well, just yelling in unision. Understanding. Cooperating. Doing as you are told. All totally optional in Toddlerville.
Anyway, off we head to the library. As we cross the parking lot, I remind again: no running; no jumping. What a waste of breath.
You see, our library is a big, fabulous building. As big as my high school practically. In fact, when we first moved 
here I thought it was a school. And, like a school, it has those wonderfully echoing hallways. And, as any 2-year old worth her salt knows, when you run or jump in said hallways in sparkly princess flip-flops it makes a loud, echo-y, slapping noise sure to irritate your mom. It will irritate her once, twice, three times over. It will irritate each and every time. A sure thing. Like death and taxes.
here I thought it was a school. And, like a school, it has those wonderfully echoing hallways. And, as any 2-year old worth her salt knows, when you run or jump in said hallways in sparkly princess flip-flops it makes a loud, echo-y, slapping noise sure to irritate your mom. It will irritate her once, twice, three times over. It will irritate each and every time. A sure thing. Like death and taxes.Twenty minutes later, after a few gentle (and a couple not-quite-as-gentle reminders), we head out, books and summer reading program prizes in hand.
And my mom wonders why I often prefer Half-Price Books over the library. Carpet, mom. Carpet. They have a lot of carpet there.
1 comment:
Hilarious. Just hilarious!! I always look forward to your posts!! I'll just sit here and be thankful that neither one of my girls like anything between their toes!! (and now that Sophia wears the same size shoe I do, I DO NOT have to share my Skecher flip flops!!) Hahaha!!!
P.S. I prefer Barnes & Noble to the library. Shhhh.....
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